Monday, 22 July 2013

Things Are Starting To Look Up.

I have accomplished so much today!

I managed to have breakfast in peace while checking out FB. You'd never guess I had children to care for. Ok well, my mum arrived and entertained Bubby while I ate and Chububby was still asleep. And yes, that is a paper towel that I used as a place mat. Don't judge me.

I had a leisurely shower and got into proper clothes albeit hastily styled. If you have a newborn you'd know that I ought to be congratulated for achieving such success.

I chased this nasty turkey that is ruining my front yard. His name will be Dinner.

Look at that trail of destruction.

Then Chububby and I went for a walk to the shopping centre. It's a pretty long walk and I made it! Gold star for effort. We met my mum and Bubby there. They caught the train which I couldn't because there is a very high set of stairs at my closest train station, so I walked. It was great to be out in the civilised world again. I only bought a bottle of water and sushi but still. Now that I know it's achievable next time I'll buy more!

We got home, I fed the kids and put them both to bed with minimal effort. 

Glorious day!



Saturday, 20 July 2013

Free Stuff!

I order groceries online nowadays as I can't drive for another week and hubby is too busy or away most of the time. As I was packing yesterday's delivery I realised that one of the bags contained stuff I didn't order. Of course it was like the second last bag I unpacked and the delivery guy had already left. I quickly called customer service and was told that mine was the last delivery and the driver was already on his way back to the store. Since there was no sticker on the bag they don't have a way of knowing to whom it belongs so if I can find a use for them they're mine to keep. Yay! for free stuff!

Hubby already opened the packet of baking chips and started eating it.

Sunny Saturday.

Sunny days are great for a neighborhood stroll.

And climbing trees.

And collecting sticks.

And playing with the neighbor's cat.

And terrorising the neighbor's cat with a stick from the collection.

Wouldn't in it be nice if everyday was like this?

Friday, 19 July 2013

A Nice Walk. Saving My Sanity.

Today Bubby, Chububby and I went for a walk. It was the first time I left the house since I got home from the hospital some 4 weeks ago. No wonder I was going stir crazy. It was nice to be outside and dressed somewhat nicely. I really enjoyed looking at the houses and their gardens on my street.

Bubby helped me push the pram.

Bubby loved to watched the goings on in the neigbourhood, mainly the gardeners trimming hedges and using leaf blowers.


Red camellias! 


Magnolias are blooming.


Pink camellias.


I love this lawn and the spring blossoms.


I'd like to know how the owners (or their gardener) made these spring blossoms look like this.

I never realised how many of my neighbours hired gardeners. I know next door does because the gardener once mistook my house for theirs and trimmed my hedges!


How cute are these hedge balls?






More Magnolias


Bubby spotted a lizard (see if you can). The kid has sharp eyes.


He also got to climb a tree.


Snow drops from my own garden, or whats left of it thanks to the bush turkeys.


My Magnolia tree with buds that are about to bloom. I can't wait!


What I wore. Lots of pink. It's my happy colour.

Orchid I received when I was in hospital. I hope I can keep it alive.


After our walk I managed to make myself morning tea while Chububby was asleep in the pram. As always he has the worst timing as he woke up just after I took this photo.


It's  good thing we went for a walk when we did because the weather turned foul shortly after we got home.

Today has been the best day I've had since coming home. I need to make this a part of my daily routine. I'm starting to feel normal again.

Tuesday, 16 July 2013

Choices and Multitasking.

It seems I am faced with a choice with every waking moment. Should I stay in bed and try to catch more sleep or should I get out of bed and spend time with Bubby, shower or eat? Once out of bed I have a choice of whether to eat or have a shower in the limited time I have. On a sunny day I have to choose whether to eat/shower/sleep or tackle the mountain of washing. Of course sometimes I have no choice when I have ran out of clothes. Sometimes both kids need me at the same time so I have to choose who to go to first. That's the hardest part.

This morning I chose to get out of bed early, have a long shower, get out of my pajamas (thanks to my mum who bought me jeans I can wear), blow dry my hair and even put blush and lip gloss on. And boy did it make a difference to my mood more than a fitful catch up nap could.

I'm wearing size 12 jeans. I can't wait to be able to workout and get back into my normal clothes. I don't think there's much I can do with the Dolly Partons. I'm not a fan of them.


I even had time for a quick breakfast and managed to drink my tea while it was still hot (hurray!) and I managed to finish it uninterrupted too.

After breakfast I was faced with another choice, to clean up after Bubby's accident (he is toilet training) or rush to feed a crying Chububby. I left Bubby to my mum and fed Chububby.

Then there are things that I can multitask with. Eating and nursing, eating and doing online grocery shopping (which always takes me a couple of hours because someone always demands my attention and I always forget something because I'm about to run out of time to place my order. I need to master the art of online grocery shopping), eating and watching tv (I think I need to do this more often), eating and spending time with Bubby. I can also nurse and blog. Chububby just managed to spew all over me as I type. He managed to miss his bib completely. Maybe I should wear a bib.

Too bad I can't eat and shower at the same time.

Sunday, 14 July 2013

Struggle Street.

I have lost my blogging mojo. I'm just not in the right headspace. Sleep deprivation, Groundhog days, juggling a newborn and a toddler (one who was sick with an ear infection and is also teething), being in pajamas all day (because I have no clothes that fit) will do that to you. I'm not going to lie, I am struggling. I feel like the worst mother. I can't stand the sound of the baby crying, (what mother does?) it sends my stress level through the roof and I get angry and frustrated. I hate the newborn stage and this time around it's worse because I'm also caring for a toddler who while he is really a very good kid is also very challenging. I find it a struggle to give quality time to Bubby when I'm torn between the two. The first week back home hubby did the daycare drop off and pick up but he can't keep leaving work early (he normally leaves work around 7-7.30 pm) so the last couple of weeks Bubby has been home with me with a nanny. While she was helpful not just with taking care of Bubby but also doing a bit of housework I was never comfortable with the idea and I really didn't like her hippy ways. I realised that I am really far too controlling and things have to be done my way (I can't even stand seeing her hang up the clothes on hangers and the hangers aren't all facing the same way. Yes, I am aware I have Issues). None of this airy fairy stuff, kids eat/drink instinctively when and what their body needs. If I was going to have a nanny she'll be a no nonsense Nanny McPhee. Anyway, hubby is back in Brisbane and my mum has taken annual leave is here with me for two weeks, and my dad is also staying but he goes to work during the day. He also brings me home some good stuff:

It took three weeks for someone to bring me sushi. Three weeks.

Duplos keep Bubby entertained quite a bit.

Bubby adores his brother to bits but he can be over-exuberant. Here he is hugging his baby brother. I find it really difficult to nurse the baby when we three are home alone as Bubby is always wanting to hug his brother. He wants to sit next to me but can only sit still for a little while before he either climbs over my back or tries to grab the baby. Drove me to tears the other day when I was trying to feed the baby and wrestle him from Bubby at the same time and the baby spewed what must have been all the milk he had drank. I was absolutely soaked and I totally lost it.

Some people have been asking when they can visit and I'm really not up for visitors. It took me months before I invited people over when I had Bubby. The baby is unsettled in the morning until lunch and I rest in the afternoon when both kids are asleep. That really leaves me with no time to have visitors. I also look terrible and the house is a mess and I will never present myself looking this way to the world. It frustrates me that I have been stuck at home since leaving the hospital. I would really like to be able to get out and buy some decent clothes particularly tops that don't make me look like Dolly Parton.

From now on the baby will be called Chububby. He gained a whopping 540 grams ten days after we left the hospital. Apparently newborns gain between 150 to 250 grams a week. At least I don't have to worry about his weight gain. My arms and back certainly feel it.


Monday, 24 June 2013

Express Delivery. A Birth Story.

Today marks the day when New Bubby was supposed to be born. It was supposed to be calm and controlled, there were to be no surprises, no contractions and no labour involved and hubby was supposed to be by my side. Oh, how things turned out differently.

The night of Saturday, June 15, I barely slept from the strong semi regular Braxton Hicks I had all night. They continued throughout Sunday but I had the same experience with Bubby and that went on for a week before I was eventually induced. The contractions were mild, didn't intensify but were fairly regular. I had to breath deeply through the contractions but I still believed they were Braxton Hicks. Hubby was to fly out to Brisbane that afternoon for one last week interstate. He asked me if I was going to give birth that night and I said don't be silly I probably have a few days so make sure he answers his phone when I call and be on the first plane back. My parents came for a visit that day and I had to ask them to stay the night because I planned on going to the hospital in the morning to be monitored and to re-assess the date for our scheduled C-section and I wasn't sure if I'm still able to drive Bubby to daycare and then myself to hospital.

After I read Bubby his bedtime stories, which was the only 15 minutes throughout that day that I didn't have contractions, I decided they must be easing and if I have to read out loud all night to stop the Braxton Hicks then I would. By 8.30 after spending sometime online researching car seats and Ergobaby carriers, I decided to have an early night. The Braxton Hicks have returned and were noticeably stronger. I layed in bed reciting and singing nursery rhymes in the hope that they will stop again but they were definitely stronger. I decided not to wait until the morning to get monitored so I phoned the hospital described the contractions to the midwife and was told to come to hospital. I asked at what point I should go in she said "immediately". Hmm, at this point I still thought that I had Braxton Hicks but was progressing much quickly than with Bubby. I called hubby (who has literally just landed) to warn him that the C-sec might be moved up to Monday or Tuesday and he should probably look at getting into the next available flight back.

By the time we were ready to go I could no longer walk through the 'bloody strong Braxton Hicks". The ride to the hospital was unbearable and it only took 10 minutes. By the time I was hooked up to the machine I couldn't talk through the contractions anymore. I was asked to put on a hospital gown. I could barely move to put it on. I was found to be 3 cm dilated and I thought that gives me at least a day based on my experience with Bubby. All this time time I still thought it was pre-labour. I called hubby to tell him I'll hold off as long as I can, still believing hubby can somehow make it. I figured, the first plane lands at 7.30, he can be here by 8, I can do it. I asked the midwife if she thought my husband will make it back in time she told me "Love, it's going to happen tonight." Throughout my ordeal that night I'm proud to say that was the one and only time that I swore.

Everyone who needed to be called in was called in. The anaesthetist came first, disappointingly still not in scrubs and with no pain relief of any sort in hand. She asked lots of questions which felt like forever as I had to keep focusing on my breathing. I asked when she can give me the drugs she said when the theatre is set up. Would I like some gas in the meantime? Hell, yes. Before she could even stand up the most intense (for that part of the night, at least) contraction took over my body with the enormous urge to push. I told the anaesthetist who called the midwife and I was found to be 7 cm dilated. Any hope I had that the epidural will hopefully slow things down so I can negotiate with my obstetrician about holding off the C-sec as long as we can so hubby has half a chance to make it there in the morning went out the window. The gas was forgotten, my obstetrician arrived and kept saying she knows this is not how I wanted things to happen and all I could think of was where is my epidural!

After what seemed like forever, they all left to get scrubbed, I was left all alone in the room. I called hubby to tell him that the C-sec was happening in about 25 minutes. I think he was stunned. I asked my dad in who I pretty much demanded to be quiet but hold my hand. I just felt like I needed to hold someone's hand and it sort of helped. I wasn't squeezing it to death or screaming like a banshee like you see in the movies. I was surprisingly very quiet, just breathing through and occasionally letting out a quiet moan as I breathed out.

Finally, everyone was back and I was wheeled out. I told my dad to go home and I'll call when it's done. You know, like it's a routine visit to the dentist. Someone asked if I wanted my dad to go into theatre with me I said no, I want hubby to be the first to see the baby. So off we went. By this time the contractions were very close together I wasn't even timing anymore. It took forever to get the needle in my spine as we had to wait for breaks in between contractions. By this stage, every contraction came with the urge to push. At this point all the wise words of my mothers' group kept entering my mind about what they'd do differently the second time around. One said she'll just let her body do what it needs to do. So when I felt the need to push I let go and it worked.

After the spinal went in I was in heaven! I was apparently 9.5 cm and the obstetrician asked me if I was sure I didn't want to deliver normally. No, thanks. People will think I'm crazy to still opt for a major operation when I made it that far without any drugs. It was in the back of my mind the whole time but the thing was I was not mentally prepared for a normal delivery despite having already done the hard yards. I had envisioned an entirely different scenario for this birth, one that didn't involve such a stressful, situation and with my husband by my side. It was going to be exciting not desperate. I think I remained pretty calm throughout the night and handled the pain well. Still, the things that went wrong during Bubby's delivery kept playing in my mind and I could not bring myself to go through with a normal delivery, especially since hubby wasn't there.

Once, the curtain was up the excitement replaced the pain and anxiety of whether I'd make it to the operating table before the baby came out. I was looking forward to the birth and thought to myself that apart from hubby not being there this is how I had played this in my head.I wasn't groggy like last time. I was completely aware of what was happening around me. I was having a normal conversation with the people around me. They were poking fun at the shape of my belly, I asked them to take a photo as I wanted to see. The assistant obstetrician joked about skypeing the birth to my husband. The mood was light and cheery. I wished my husband was there. At the very least I wished I was on the phone with him so he could have heard New bubby's first cry. Boy, did he cry. When he was lifted he was bright red, kicking and screaming. Unlike, Bubby who didn't cry for what felt like ages and had to be resuscitated this one had a set of lungs in him. I felt that it was a very positive experience and have no regrets about how the night turned out except that I wished for hubby to have been there. New Bubby stayed with me in theatre while I recovered unlike last time when I was left all alone in recovery. The nurses were there the whole time as I recovered and chatted with me. I couldn't hold the baby because I was shaking like a leaf from the spinal but I didn't care. He was there with me and he was healthy.

Hubby managed to get on the first flight back and went straight to the hospital after a night of no sleep. He got his first cuddle and skin to skin. We're amazed at how much the the New Bubby looked just like Bubby. He's just a little bit plumper and more fair. He also has grey eyes compared to Bubby's dark brown eyes that look almost black but everything else looked exactly the same. They even made the same sounds.

Well, that sounded like a saga even though the main event (arrival at hospital to birth) only lasted about 3 hours.

The really good thing about the birth is that he doesn't share the same birthday as the Kimye baby.


Bubby meets Baby Brother for the first time. He was so excited!

Stats:
Date of Birth - 17 June, 2013
Time of Birth -  0:35
Weight - 3.06 kg (Bubby was 2.7 kg)
Length - 50 cm (same as Bubby)
Head Circumference - 34 cm (same as Bubby)
Apgar 1 min - 9 (Bubby's was 5)
Apgar 5 min - 9